According to Jewelry and Engagement Study of over 21,000 to-be-weds or newlyweds, 94 percent of proposers pay for the engagement ring. But who buys the wedding bands? As with engagement rings, a precedent has been set. That said, there aren't hard-and-fast rules.
Here, we tell you what's "traditional" when it comes to who pays for wedding rings, plus what modern couples are doing. Yep, you have options—so choose what's right for you. And once you determine who's footing the bill, we'll help you find a place to buy the jewellery.
For most soon-to-be-married couples, the tradition of who pays for the engagement ring is pretty clear-cut. Historically, the man or proposer selects and pays for the engagement ring. But what about wedding bands? Does the groom choose and pay for those, too? The best answer is that it depends on what you and your spouse decide. Here's some more information to help you navigate the process.
In centuries past, the tradition was for the bride or her family to pay for the man's wedding ring, and the groom or his family to pay for the bride's. That was an especially prevalent way of doing things before engagement rings—which were, of course, selected and purchased by the man for the woman. However, these days, it's not so cut-and-dry. More often, the rings are the responsibility of the couple as a unit and not their families.
Table of Contents
- 1 What Are Wedding Bands?
- 2 Wedding Ring Traditions
- 3 Paying For The Bands Together Or Individually
- 4 Who Buys The Wedding Bands?
- 5 Who Buys The Wedding Bands?
- 6 Who Buys The Groom's Wedding Ring?
- 7 Who Buys The Bride's Wedding Ring?
- 8 How To Decide Who Buys the Wedding Rings?
- 9 Talk Openly With Your Future Spouse
What Are Wedding Bands?
Wedding bands are often simple, unadorned bands without a big diamond or other stone, although they can include stones or engravings if that's your style. As we mentioned above, these bands are the rings that you actually exchange at your wedding ceremony, instead of engagement rings that you use to propose.
These rings are typically more simple, and therefore less expensive than engagement rings. Some couples opt for a plain metal band, while others add gemstones, engravings, or other features. Tattoo wedding rings are becoming popular today!
The cost of wedding bands will depend on the type of metal you choose, ring size, and any other features you want to be included.
Wedding Ring Traditions
The exchanging of rings is one of the most traditional exercises in marriage and can be traced back to ancient times. When the tradition first began, wedding rings were made of materials such as hemp or leather, and only until much later did people start crafting rings out of precious metals like silver and gold. Since the price of metal and gold continues to rise, so does the price of wedding rings. Now, due to the high financial burden, there is more pressure than ever as to who buys the wedding rings.
The stone in an engagement ring is also one steeped in decades-long tradition. Diamonds are most popularly used in wedding rings. They are the hardest and, arguably, the most stunning substance on earth. While diamonds are captivating set in an engagement ring, technology has given us many alternative and more affordable options. Couples can choose between various human-made stones, including diamond simulants, lab diamonds and lab gemstones. While they each feature different characteristics and each person will prefer something a little different, you can be sure these stones don't contribute to the 'blood diamond trade'. While this is certainly new and untraditional in the wedding space, choosing a human-made stone will give you peace of mind when purchasing such a sentimental adornment.
Paying For The Bands Together Or Individually
Usually, the bride and groom pay for their own bands together as a couple. If you keep your finances separate and plan to do so when you get married, you might consider creating a joint wedding savings account or pot from which you can pull for all wedding-related costs, including your rings.
Who Buys The Wedding Bands?
Who buys the wedding rings is a question that has no right or wrong answer. Holding a wedding is probably the most expensive business. Although the main cost of the wedding is paid by one or both parents, it is good to be able to do this for the other. When it comes to the most critical part of preparing for the upcoming wedding, people have to argue whether it is to maintain traditional etiquette or modern customs during busy weddings. It is a daunting task to figure out who should be responsible for the cost of a pair of wedding rings. Some people say that it should be the responsibility of the bride. While some people think it should be the responsibility of the groom. Some people even think that their family should also contribute. But the real question is, who buys the wedding bands?
When a couple gets engaged, it's customary for the future groom to propose to his bride with an engagement ring that he purchased. But, who buys the wedding bands?
Traditionally, the bride wears her engagement ring during the engagement period, but the happy couple exchanges wedding rings on the wedding day. These rings, also called wedding bands, are generally less expensive and extravagant than an engagement ring.
While wedding traditions seem to evolve constantly—even your parents' wedding will probably look much different than yours—so do wedding ring traditions. For decades it was thought that your gender would determine what role you had in purchasing the wedding rings. Now, the rules have flipped, and it's much less clear as to who is responsible for simulated diamond jewellery. More couples than ever are discussing wedding expenses—including both engagement rings and wedding bands—together as a team.
Although making these decisions as a couple has become the more common approach, many still choose to participate in classic traditions. These traditions may include the groom purchasing the rings, the bride being handed down an heirloom engagement ring, or customs on how to wear a wedding ring set. Before you celebrate your big day or even pop the question, it's important to know who buys the wedding bands for the wedding ceremony.
Who Buys The Wedding Bands?
There are many different answers to the question of who buys a wedding ring. Engagement rings are often the most expensive, followed by the bride's wedding ring. Depending on the ring and the material, the groom's wedding ring is often cheaper than the bride. Thus, couples usually agree that the bridegroom will buy an engagement ring for the bride, and the bride will buy a wedding ring for the groom.
While the groom has been the primary wedding ring buyer over the last many decades, that doesn't mean the tradition still stands. Who buys the wedding bands will depend on a few different aspects- like if you have a shared bank account or you prefer to split costs whenever possible. Every couple will differ on how they choose to deal with the situation. Here are some aspects to consider when deciding who buys the wedding rings for your big day.
Because the wedding ring symbolizes a commitment to a future companion and marriage, it is good to buy a wedding ring with your own money, rather than borrowing money from your family. Who buys a wedding ring should not be a problem. Instead, talk to your partner, and you would make the right decision
Of course, many brides and grooms also start making their wedding rings instead of buying them. DIY wedding rings come in a wide range of materials, and they are also able to create their unique wedding ring according to their ideas. This is more commemorative for couples. At the same time, it is very romantic to engrave the lovers' names on the ring to witness your happiness.
Open communication is an excellent option for overcoming this dilemma. Sitting down and having an honest conversation about what you both prefer will bring you much closer to figuring out an outcome. This will also prevent any negative feelings that could arise from making this large financial investment. You'll want to be sure you are both on the same page about finances when beginning this new journey as a couple. Plus, since this conversation can happen after the engagement ring is purchased, it won't give away the proposal if you're planning a surprise.
While many married couples choose to conjoin their bank accounts, it's widespread to keep finances separate before matrimony. If you are not planning to use the same pot of money for these financial decisions, it may make sense to split the cost evenly. Depending on how much money was invested in the engagement ring, the one who didn't buy the engagement ring may choose to buy both wedding bands. This will allow for a much more even spend as a wedding band usually costs significantly less than an engagement ring.
Another tip is to look at your financial history as a couple. You should consider what you have done in the past as a couple to help to steer you in a direction. If you've always split costs evenly whenever possible, then it may make the most sense to continue down this path. It is now more popular than ever for couples to decide to split all wedding expenses. Most couples choose to buy each other's rings, although, for more traditional couples, it may be more appropriate for the groom to buy both.
Considering your future together is also an important tip to keep in mind. Depending on if you have big honeymoon plans or if you're in the process of purchasing a home, you may decide that you will need to stay within a specific budget to save money for more important things. You may even choose to buy a set of inexpensive bands for the ceremony that can be replaced with higher quality ones shortly.
Who Buys The Groom's Wedding Ring?
Tradition has it that the "bride" (with or without help from her family) buys "the man's" wedding ring. But this "rule" is obviously binary—it assumes that all weddings involve a woman and her groom. In more inclusive terms, each half of the couple is expected to pay for their other half's wedding band.
Nowadays, though, who buys the wedding bands is pretty up in the air. Some couples are splitting the cost of their wedding rings. This might make sense if you've already combined your finances prewedding or if you two are paying for all (or part) of your wedding together as a shared expense. This doesn't mean you have to contribute an equal amount to the bands, though (you could divide the total cost proportional to your individual incomes, for example, which is a common practice when it comes to splitting costs as a couple in general.)
As with most relationship situations involving money, you are talking it out and coming to a mutual agreement is the best course of action. Maybe you buy both the wedding rings, and your partner covers a different wedding expense. Maybe your parents chip in. Maybe you buy your ring, and your future spouse buys theirs! It's all about what works for you, your significant other and your families.
Like who buys the bride's wedding band, many couples have opted to make both ring purchases together. Even men's wedding rings can be costly as they contain a lot of metal. For this reason, couples may choose to purchase rings for each other or together using the same pot of money. While the price between a men's and women's wedding ring may not be completely equal- especially if one of them features accents- paying for them using one of these two methods is a good idea to even out the expenses.
Traditionally, the bride, or the bride's family, buys her groom's wedding ring. This dates back to the tradition of a dowry, where the bride's family gives gifts to the groom in exchange for the marriage. Some couples choose to maintain this tradition, in part because grooms pay for engagement rings, which are typically much more expensive.
In a modern context, these traditional rules no longer matter. More often than not, the bride and groom share expenses for the wedding and shop and pay for the rings together.
While many people believe that the bride should buy the groom's wedding ring according to the dowry's tradition, the reality is that men did not always wear wedding rings.
Who Buys The Bride's Wedding Ring?
Tradition has it that the bride (and her family) buys the groom's wedding ring, while the groom (and his family) pays for the bride's. Again, this language is binary—the real moral of the story is that each person traditionally pays for the other person's ring.
Nowadays, as we've explained above, who buys the wedding bands is really up to the couple. Go ahead and gift each other wedding bands ahead of the big day, or work out a different payment plan with each other and your families.
Again, according to tradition, the groom would buy the bride's wedding band. If you're extremely traditional, you can choose to buy each other wedding rings as gifts. Some people would even argue that the groom should buy both wedding rings and the engagement ring.
As we mentioned above, most couples don't follow these rules anymore. While you can choose to give each other your wedding rings as gifts, you can also split the cost evenly between the two of you.
Alternatively, one person could buy both wedding rings if the other is putting more money towards another part of the wedding. If your finances are not already combined, you can choose to split up wedding expenses in whatever way works for you and your significant other.
How To Decide Who Buys the Wedding Rings?
If you're unsure how your future spouse wants to handle the wedding band question, just ask! The key to any good marriage is open and honest communication, so it should be easy to have a conversation about who will buy the wedding rings.
Find time during your wedding planning process to discuss the question of wedding rings with your partner. This is a good time to discuss who will pay for the rings and whether or not your wedding bands should match. Figure out what styles each of you likes and whether or not you want your bands to match.
For some couples, finances can be a complicated issue. Perhaps one partner is struggling with unemployment, or one partner makes significantly more money than the other.
If financial discussions are often tense or awkward, you may want to approach the question of who pays for the rings delicately. Budgeting for a wedding is no small task, so work this question into your wedding budget's larger question and who is paying for what.
Talk Openly With Your Future Spouse
Figuring out who pays for what during the wedding planning process can be tricky, but most decisions can be sorted out by having an open, frank conversation with your partner. This goes for everything—from the dress price and suit to the rings' cost, which is often a huge financial investment for many couples.
The best thing to do when deciding how to pay for any of these things is to create a wedding budget and discuss with your partner how you'd like to handle things. Remember, the wedding bands aren't like the engagement ring—traditionally, they should come out of the total wedding budget rather than be separated into their pile.
While many couples opt to spend thousands on wedding bands, there are plenty of alternative routes you can take to keep costs low and to remove some of the confusion from the who-pays-for-what conversation. Today, many brides and grooms opt for more affordable silicone wedding bands to remove some of the situation's financial stress. You may also choose to wear these until you can afford to buy the one you want.
Now that you understand that who buys the wedding bands truly depends on your unique situation, you can begin the conversation. While discussing finances is often not the most pleasurable topic, it is certainly essential. Getting married is a lifelong commitment in which you will have many conversations about money. It's best to start talking about it sooner than later so you can become comfortable with each other in these types of situations.
If your wedding is quickly approaching and you're still uncertain which path to take, ask others for advice. Friends and family who have been married will share their situation and what they decided to do in the end. No matter which approaches you to take- whether buying together or separate- both people should feel comfortable with the decision. You will wear your wedding rings for the rest of your life, and you want only to have fond memories when looking at them and remembering your engagement journey and wedding day.