You may believe this about wedding preparations while you are in the midst of them. Never heard that from a bride! It's easy to feel like you're in over your head with all the decisions you have to make and the number of tasks you have to complete. Yet, one ought to enjoy the process of organising a wedding.
Here are some ideas for making the preparations as much fun as the event itself. How are you bringing more joy into the process of organizing your wedding?
Leave Yourself A plenty Time
Many married couples rush into setting wedding plans so soon after the proposal that they don't give them enough time to properly plan the event.
In order to bring everything together in such a short amount of time, they will have to make some tough choices.
As a general guideline, a year should be allotted for the wedding planning process. Time passes quickly when you're on a schedule, but when you're not, it might feel like an eternity.
You might start making preparations without first deciding on a date. Setting a date and giving yourself a deadline allows you to start planning the attire, decorations, theme, and food far before the actual event.
Don't be in a hurry to get married; your shared existence will begin long before that.
Check out our Top Wedding Planners here to help make your special day as smooth as possible.
FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS
Finalizing a guest list may be the most stressful part of wedding planning. You, your fiancé, and both sets of parents often have opinions about who should (and shouldn't!) be invited on the big day. Cutting a guest can feel painful, but it's unrealistic to think that your budget and venue can accommodate everyone.
This is a very stressful time and it's totally reasonable, acceptable, and applauded to get some support whether it be from family, friends, or a mental health professional. If you don't like the wedding planning process, we can't stress this enough: You are not alone.
Here are a few communication-related red flags to look out for from your partner: Shuts down when having tough, emotional conversations. Runs away from, minimizes, or completely ignores conflict. Searches and finds ways to avoid responsibility (and places the blame on you or others)
According to experts, pre-wedding jitters are a perfectly normal part of the process. It's completely natural to feel anxious as you approach a big life milestone. Admitting how you are feeling, and looking for ways to handle these feelings doesn't mean you are getting cold feet.
According to the latest research, it takes an average of 6 to 12 months to plan weddings. Some busy couples prefer to extend the wedding planning timeline to 18 months to give themselves some extra wiggle room, as well. The sooner you can knock out wedding planning, the better.
Couldn't You Handle It On Your Own?
It's possible that one member of the couple-to-be is taking the lead in the wedding's preparations, but it doesn't absolve the others of their share of the responsibility.
It's both your wedding, thus you can and should seek each other's assistance. It's also crucial not to let one partner do all the planning while disregarding the other's input.
Since a marriage is a joint venture, the nuptials serve as the first joint challenge! Obviously, you can also accept assistance from others.
You can engage a wedding photographer planner to assist you through the countless options for reception halls, wedding cakes, and bridal gowns, or you can enlist the support of your loved ones.
Work As A Unit Right Away
One partner may feel more passionately about organising the wedding than the other, and it's easy to allow that individual to take the lead.
However, problems can arise in the future with managing your budget, interacting with vendors, or answering queries from family and friends if you aren't all on the same page.
It's important to have an open conversation about your ideal wedding day, guest list, how much of the planning you'd like to accomplish on your own versus how much money you're willing to spend, and whether or not you'd like to hire a wedding planner before moving on with any other details.
The greatest way to keep the peace during a time that should be joyful and carefree is to talk it out.
Form A Powerful Group
Distributing tasks between close friends and family members can lighten the load of wedding planning significantly.
Especially in the final days and weeks before your marriage, it is crucial to enjoy the journey but not feel like you must be tying 150 small bows on your tablecloths, all by yourself.
This is especially true if you are extremely close to doing something (or not a huge delegator).
Having other people take part will make your special day that much more memorable.
Gather a crew to help you with the mason jar collection, sign hanging, guest ushering, and vendor payments; they can be members of your family, your wedding party, or just a group of generous friends.
You shouldn't expect to, and probably can't, accomplish everything on your own.
Do Something Original
The process of organising a wedding shouldn't be limited to spreadsheets and rigid timetables. Enjoy yourself; this is an opportunity to let your imagination run wild.
Have fun arranging the centrepieces by bringing home an arrangement of flowers, ribbons, and wire. Get yourself a pair of white sneakers and decorate them with glitter glue and spray paint.
Get in the mood and plan your first dancing to your favourite tune. Spend an afternoon with a wine bottle and your best wedding invitation language in mind.
Enjoy yourself while you prepare for this momentous occasion; failure to do so will defeat the very point of the occasion itself.
Make Wedding Preparations a Game
Get competitive with your fiance by holding a "stamp off" to determine who really can stamp its most envelopes.
Alternatively, host a cocktail party and put your guests to the test with a contest for the best signature drink and its name.
Infinitely creative games can be devised to make wedding preparations more enjoyable for all parties.
Use This Opportunity To Its Fullest Potential
Wedding service providers, from caterers to reception halls, would like you to have a positive experience with them since they know how much stress newlyweds are under.
In order to help you decide which one to go with, many of them will provide you with some sort of free service.
Hotels that are in contention to host your event may offer you free meals or a spa day if you stay there for a night to get a feel for the place.
Bakeries and catering services both offer complimentary samples of their wares to potential customers.
These are the kind of thoughtful tokens of appreciation that come at just the right time in the preparation process and make everything much more manageable.
Take Into Account Hiring People
The ongoing need for communication and arrangement between several individuals, businesses, and events is one of the main challenges of planning a wedding.
You should always search for organisations that offer several services, such as a catering company which will take care of a cake, a photographic studio that will also take better care of the video, or a make - up artist that sends along their hairstylist.
This will not only save you time by reducing the number of individuals with whom you have to coordinate efforts, but it will ensure that the people you hire are able to collaborate effectively and do not create unnecessary friction.
Prepare The Minds of Others
It's wonderful when loved ones show interest in what you're up to, but it can quickly become too much.
It's best to give your parents and other elder relatives some idea of the vibe you're going for if you're having a casual, non-religious, or otherwise non-traditional wedding, and the same goes if your wedding will be small and invite-only.
In the run-up to the wedding, miscommunication and wounded feelings can add unnecessary strain, so it's important to manage your guests' expectations early on.
Create A Spending Plan That Takes Reality Into Account
The vast majority of engaged couples will create a wedding budget outlining how much money they plan to allocate to various aspects of the wedding.
It's not common for teams to create budgets based on actual costs, though. Therefore, once payments begin, you may find yourself unexpectedly over budget.
Just too hectic to devote much time to the wedding's finer details, huh? You can get an idea of what items may cost by calling local suppliers or asking recently married friends how much people spent on certain parts of their wedding.
Talking about money, especially with friends, might feel awkward, but asking questions ahead of time can help you avoid unpleasant surprises later on.
Determine how much money you have available for the wedding and talk to your parents about whether or not they would be willing to contribute to the cost.
You should be fine as long as you add in fees and tips and round up your totals by at least 10%.
Create Your Own (Reasonable) Standards
So, you've probably fantasised of a large white dress, a grand banquet hall, a decadent 10-tiered wedding cake, and an audience of your closest friends and family members.
There's no reason you can't have it all (there really are methods for making things work in each and every budget!), but staying grounded in reality and perspective is crucial for keeping your cool as you plan your wedding.
Try not to stress out about planning the "ideal wedding." Don't waste your time seeking for problems; there are none.
Expectations management includes managing your own. You can still look stunning on your wedding day without dieting, getting gobs of botox, or getting larger breasts.
Eating healthy and exercising regularly might help with pre-wedding stress, there's no need in torturing yourself for an entire year in order to fit into a smaller dress.
Putting aside any pressure to appear a particular way on her wedding day is a wonderful feeling of freedom. Maintain reasonable expectations of other people as well.
Even while your loved ones and bridal party members are just as thrilled for you, they might not always show it. If someone seems disinterested, try not to take it personally.
Pick Two Critical Objectives
When asked for guidance on wedding preparations, couples are often told to "choose two or three priorities and focus your spending on those."
The problem is that most people care more about the food, the photos, the tunes, or the venue than they do about the actual event itself.
All of those add up to the most significant costs in organising a wedding.
If you want to keep things simple (and within budget), pick either food and photos or photography as well as entertainment.
If you can't get your first choice on everything, don't let it worry you out; you can still locate a terrific venue, caterer, or music. On the big day, you won't even think about the concessions you made.
It's Important To Practise Saying No Confidently
Planning a wedding can be a great chance to practise your diplomatic skills. You can't even begin to fathom how stressful it has to be for couples whose family have a lot of opinions and demands.
Receipt of criticism and input should be practised. In the end, though, it's your big day.
Just tell your parents "no" if they insist on inviting their third cousin, playing the bagpipes, or include a bouquet throw in the ceremony when you don't want any of those things.
While it's understandable to make an exception here and there, if you constantly find yourself saying "yes" when it causes you to lose track of your day, it's time to figure out how to politely (but firmly) tell people that their request isn't part of your schedule.
Create A Plan B For The Wedding
Perhaps it goes without saying, but don't put your life on pause for the duration of the wedding preparation process.
Many engaged couples put everything else on hold as they save and plan for their wedding, only to be left with a profound sense of loss once the big day has come and gone.
Spend your engagement doing things other than planning a wedding. Spend time with pals without discussing your upcoming nuptials.
When you've spent what seems like a whole year preparing for your wedding, it's natural to be concerned about how things will come out.
Although your wedding is a major life event, it shouldn't consume all of your time and energy.
Arrange A Special Evening Together
Do you find it difficult to make certain selections? Make it a night out with your significant other.
You can clear your head and have a good time by going out with your soon-to-be-husband or just spending the night in.
Please don't bring up the wedding on your date evenings! Consider the reasons for your wedding and your plans for the future instead.
Need help planning your wedding? Check out our list of Wedding Event Planners here.
Organize A Celebration For Your Benefactors
Does it seem like you and your bridesmaids have exchanged a gazillion texts about the bridesmaids' attire, their jewelry, the bachelorette, the bridal shower, and everything else?
To get everything sorted out, have a nacho bar at your house.
Instead of exchanging dozens of emails on the seating arrangement, host a dinner with your future spouse and both sets of parents.
You may also get your bridesmaids involved by having a girl's night when they help you with DIY projects in exchange for pizza and drinks.
Preparation Time Must Be Scheduled
As such, schedule some time specifically for preparation. Sometime on a Monday or Saturday, for example.
You'll feel like you're getting things done and that wedding planning isn't taking over your life when you set out time each week to make decisions.
Eighty-nine percent of brides reported completing wedding planning on workplace time, therefore designating a specific period for this will reduce tensions between employees and their employers.
Develop a Timeline Strategy
The best piece of advise for avoiding wedding preparation stress is this.
You will be able to sit back, rest, and take pleasure in the buildup to your marriage in the weeks leading up to the big event.
Completing Boring or Uninteresting Tasks Should Be Rewarded.
Did you finally make an appointment with the florist? Break out the champagne! Find your favorite meal while you put together your invitations.
Having a rewarding reward waiting at the end of a difficult activity will make the task much more bearable.
Invest Your Time in What You Enjoy, and Let Others Handle the Rest.
If deciding on the playlist is too much of a burden, give that responsibility to your future spouse.
In other words, have mum take care of the flowers if you can't tell a petunia from a peony.
If you delegate the work you'd rather not do, you'll have more time to devote to the activities you truly enjoy.
Spend Your Money Wisely and Work with Experts
Every future Mrs. can attest that the wedding preparations are stressful.
If you find yourself becoming overwhelmed, hiring a wedding planner can be a terrific way to relax and enjoy the planning process.
Having someone hold your hand through it all will free up a lot more time for enjoyment.
Don't lose sight of the fact that you're preparing for the best day of your life, because in the end, it will all be worth it.
A lot of engaged couples hurry into making wedding arrangements so quickly after the proposal that they don't have enough time to properly prepare for the big day.
The time spent organising a wedding should be at least a year long. There's no need to rush into marriage; your shared life together will begin long before the wedding.
Important as it is to enjoy the ride, you shouldn't have to feel like you have to tie 150 tiny bows on your tablecloths by yourself. Call in the troops to help with the mason jar roundup, the sign installation, and the vendor reimbursements.
It is possible to come up with an infinite number of games to play during the wedding planning process. Providers of wedding services recognise the emotional strain that newlyweds are under and work hard to ensure a great customer experience.
Hotels competing to host your event may provide perks like complimentary dinners or a spa visit in order to sway your decision.
Some businesses, like bakeries and catering services, give out free samples of their goods to attract new consumers. Talk to your parents about how much of a contribution they can make to the wedding and how much money you have available.
You don't need to starve yourself, get a tonne of Botox, or get breast implants to look gorgeous on your wedding day. Don't take it personally if someone seems uninterested. The diplomatic skills you'll need to use in wedding planning.
If you don't want your third cousin, the bagpipes, or a bouquet toss at your wedding, don't be afraid to tell your parents so.
Ninety percent of brides said they planned their weddings while at work. Having a set time for this to happen would help ease tensions between workers and management. Hiring a wedding planner is a great way to take the stress out of the preparations and actually enjoy them.
- Wedding planning is something that should be enjoyed.
- Don't hurry into making wedding plans; many couples become engaged and start making arrangements for the wedding before they've had enough time to fully prepare.
- Wedding preparations, as a rule of thumb, require a full year's time.
- You could begin planning arrangements before settling on a date.
- There's no need to rush into marriage; your shared life together will begin long before the wedding.
- Even though one part of the engaged couple is taking the lead in wedding planning, that does not relieve the other members of the pair from their duties.
- Since this is a joint wedding, you have every right to and indeed should rely on one another.
- It's also important for both partners to have input into the planning process, rather than having just one person take charge.
- Before moving forwards with any other details, you and your partner should have a frank discussion about your ideal wedding day, guest list, how much of the planning you'd like to accomplish on your own versus how much money you're willing to spend, and whether or not you'd like to hire a wedding planner.
- Having close friends and family help out with the wedding preparations is a great way to reduce stress.
- It's unrealistic to think you'll be able to solve every problem on your own.
- The planning of a wedding shouldn't be confined to excel spreadsheets and inflexible schedules.
- Relax and let your mind wander; this is your chance to dream big.
- Set the mood by thinking about your first dance to your favourite song.
- It is possible to come up with an infinite number of games to play during the wedding planning process.
- The constant need for communication and arrangement between several people, businesses, and events is one of the key problems of wedding planning.
- It's vital to manage your guests' expectations early on to avoid any needless stress in the lead-up to the wedding due to miscommunication or hurt feelings.
- Most engaged couples will make a wedding budget describing how much money they intend to spend on various components of the wedding and how they intend to spend it.
- Money can be a touchy subject, especially when discussing it with friends, but asking questions now can help you prevent embarrassment later.
- Find out if your parents are willing to help with the wedding expenses and how much money you have available.
- Keeping your calm when wedding planning requires you to keep your feet firmly planted on the ground of reality and perspective.
- Don't get worked up over having the perfect wedding.
- Looking for issues is a waste of time because there are none.
- Managing other people's expectations entails also managing your own.
- Be sure to keep your own expectations in check.
- The issue is that most individuals are more concerned with the catering, photography, music, and/or location than they are with the event itself.
- Don't stress if you can't book your ideal venue, caterer, or entertainment because you can still pull off a fantastic event.
- Planning a wedding can be an excellent opportunity to hone your diplomatic abilities, including the art of politely declining invitations.
- If you don't want your third cousin, the bagpipes, or a bouquet toss at your wedding, don't be afraid to tell your parents so.
- An occasional exception is fine, but if you find yourself routinely agreeing to things that take you away from your day's goals, you may want to politely (but firmly) decline other people's requests.
- Though it may go without saying, it's important to keep your life moving forwards while you're planning the wedding.
- Your engagement should not be spent solely on wedding preparations.
- Have fun with your friends without bringing up your wedding plans.
- Organizing a wedding is a big deal, but it shouldn't be your whole focus.
- Hosting a meal with your future spouse and both sets of parents is preferable to exchanging dozens of emails over the seating arrangement.
- You should set aside some time in your calendar for actual preparation.
- When you schedule time each week to make decisions, you'll feel more in control and like wedding planning isn't taking over your life.
- The best piece of guidance for keeping stress levels down throughout wedding planning is to adopt a timeline strategy.
- All brides-to-be will agree that wedding planning may be a lot of work, so it's important to budget carefully and consult with professionals.