I remember when my partner and I began planning our wedding. It was clear from the start that we wanted something that felt deeply personal. Not the grandiose affair that many couples dream of, but something that felt true to us. That’s when we first looked into the idea of an intimate wedding – and let me tell you, it was a game changer.
So, what exactly is an intimate wedding? Simply put, it’s a smaller celebration, typically with 10-50 guests. But it’s important to note that there’s no hard-and-fast rule on the number of people. Some couples prefer an intimate gathering with only close family and friends – around 30 people, say. Others may stretch that number to 50, or even 100, depending on how they define “intimate.” Ultimately, it’s about size – and the intention behind that small guest list.
The beauty of intimate weddings lies in their flexibility. Unlike a large wedding with hundreds of guests where you’re often rushing from one moment to the next, intimate weddings allow for a more laid-back experience. There’s more room for meaningful conversations, more time to spend with each person who matters most, and less of that overwhelming “on show” feeling.
Take, for instance, a couple I worked with who chose to marry in a local Melbourne garden with only 20 guests. They had a beautiful outdoor ceremony in the late afternoon, with the sun dipping low behind the trees. It wasn’t a huge production – but it was intimate, heartfelt, and absolutely unforgettable.
How an Intimate Wedding Creates a Personalized Experience
When I think back to my own wedding, one of the things that stands out most is how personal everything felt. Because we kept the guest list small, we were able to tailor every little detail to reflect who we are as a couple.
This is what makes intimate weddings so special. There’s less focus on impressing a large crowd, and more space to make your celebration uniquely yours. Imagine being able to write your own vows, or hand-pick every single person in the room – it’s all about creating a moment that is meaningful to you and your partner.
With a smaller guest list, there’s also the opportunity to involve loved ones in special ways. Maybe you’ve got a talented friend who can play music for the ceremony, or a family member who’s an incredible cook and can help cater. These personal touches add a level of warmth and authenticity that you just can’t replicate at larger events.
The Benefits of an Intimate Wedding Experience
As you approach the final stages of your wedding planning, you may be wondering if an intimate wedding is really the right choice for you. After all, many people envision their big day as a grand celebration with all their family and friends. However, there are countless reasons why couples – including my partner and me – choose to go down the intimate route, and I can confidently say it was the best decision we made.
An intimate wedding gives you the freedom to focus on what really matters: your relationship. When you strip away the noise of large guest lists, expensive décor, and endless vendor lists, you get to focus on creating meaningful moments with the people who truly matter. And for many couples, that’s the most important aspect of the day.
In Melbourne, where weddings are often extravagant affairs, it can feel like everyone is pushing for a “bigger is better” mentality. But after speaking with couples who have gone down the intimate path, it’s clear that smaller weddings offer an entirely different experience – one that’s more relaxed, less stressful, and far more meaningful.
The benefits of an intimate wedding are clear:
- Closer connections: You spend more quality time with each guest, rather than feeling like you’re racing through greetings.
- Cost-effective: A smaller guest list means you can allocate more funds to the things that matter to you most, like a luxurious venue or a personal photographer.
- Less stress: Fewer logistics mean more room to focus on what’s important – enjoying your day and being present.
- Personalisation: With fewer people, you can truly reflect your personality in every detail – from décor to the venue, ceremony, and even the food.
When we got married, our intimate wedding gave us the space to create an unforgettable experience that was true to us. We didn’t worry about pleasing everyone or keeping up with tradition – we focused on each other and the people who meant the most to us. And honestly, I wouldn’t have done it any other way.
Planning Your Intimate Wedding: Tips for a Seamless Celebration
Creating a Minimal Wedding Guest List
One of the first steps when planning an intimate wedding is curating your guest list. This is often one of the most difficult decisions for couples to make, but it’s also one of the most important. The beauty of an intimate wedding is that it allows you to focus on the people who truly matter – those who have supported you throughout your journey as a couple.
When my partner and I were planning our wedding, we knew that the guest list would be the first big decision we’d face. We were clear from the start that we wanted to invite only our closest family and friends. We kept it small, inviting just 30 people – but we made sure that every single person on that list was someone who we’d want to spend quality time with.
So, how do you approach the guest list? Here are a few tips:
- Start with immediate family: These are the people who have been a part of your life for the longest. Parents, siblings, and any other close family members should be at the top of your list.
- Prioritise your closest friends: Think about the people who have been there for you through thick and thin – the ones who know your story and support your relationship. Only invite those who truly add value to your day.
- Don’t feel obligated: The beauty of an intimate wedding is that you don’t have to invite distant relatives, work colleagues, or acquaintances just because of tradition. This is your day, and it should be about those who matter to you most.
- Set a hard limit: Once you decide on a number, stick to it. Having a guest list limit will help you stay focused and avoid stretching the boundaries of your vision.
A good rule of thumb is to invite those who you want to have a meaningful conversation with during the day. If you can’t picture spending quality time with someone, they might not be the best fit for your intimate wedding.
Choosing the Perfect Venue for an Intimate Celebration
The venue plays a significant role in setting the tone for your intimate wedding. Since the guest list is small, you have the flexibility to choose unique, non-traditional venues that reflect your personality and vision for the day.
For instance, when my partner and I were looking for a venue, we didn’t want a cookie-cutter reception hall. We wanted something that felt personal, something that had character. After considering a few options, we fell in love with the idea of getting married in a small boutique venue in Melbourne’s Fitzroy. The venue had charm and intimacy, which is exactly what we were looking for. Plus, the staff there went above and beyond to create a warm, inviting atmosphere that felt more like a celebration at home than a formal event.
Here are some venue ideas for an intimate wedding:
- Private residences: Whether it’s a beautiful home in the suburbs or a secluded beach house, a private residence offers unparalleled intimacy. It also gives you the flexibility to personalise every detail.
- Boutique hotels: For couples who want a more luxurious feel without the overwhelming size of a large hotel, boutique hotels offer the perfect blend of style and intimacy. These venues often have unique design elements and a more personal touch.
- Outdoor venues: Whether it’s a garden, a winery, or a park, outdoor venues allow for a relaxed and picturesque celebration. In Melbourne, many couples choose venues like the Royal Botanic Gardens or the Yarra Valley vineyards for their smaller ceremonies.
- Restaurants and cafes: If you’re going for a more relaxed, low-key vibe, why not host your reception at a favourite local restaurant or cafe? The best part is you’re supporting local businesses while enjoying fantastic food and company.
No matter which venue you choose, remember that it’s about creating an experience that reflects you as a couple. It’s not about grandeur, but about setting a tone that feels authentic.
Personalizing Your Ceremony and Reception
One of the most rewarding parts of planning an intimate wedding is how much flexibility you have in personalising both your ceremony and reception. Without the need to adhere to large-scale traditions, you can truly make your day your own.
For example, when we got married, we opted for a circular seating arrangement during the ceremony. This allowed our guests to be closer to us and create a sense of unity. We also wrote our own vows, which made the ceremony feel incredibly personal. The smaller setting made it easy to share this intimate moment with the people who mattered most.
Here are some ways you can make your ceremony and reception uniquely yours:
- Personal vows: Writing your own vows allows you to express your love and commitment in a way that feels authentic to you both. It’s a deeply personal moment that larger weddings may not offer as much space for.
- Involve your guests: With a small guest list, you have the opportunity to incorporate your loved ones into the ceremony. For example, you could ask a close friend or family member to officiate the ceremony, or have your guests share a reading or blessing during the vows.
- Seated dinner: Unlike traditional weddings where you may have a buffet or standing reception, an intimate wedding allows you to create a more formal, seated dinner where guests can enjoy a relaxed, gourmet meal together. This is the perfect opportunity to feature locally sourced food or curate a personalised menu that reflects your tastes.
- Personalised décor: With fewer guests, you can go all out with small, personalised details. Think custom table settings, unique floral arrangements, or even bespoke wedding favours that reflect your personality. It’s these little touches that make your wedding day feel intimate and special.
Why Simple Weddings Can Feel Luxurious
One of the biggest misconceptions about intimate weddings is that they’re somehow less luxurious than their larger counterparts. In reality, intimate weddings often feel more luxurious because the focus shifts from grand displays to quality and detail.
During my own wedding, we opted for a simple yet elegant reception at a small restaurant in Fitzroy. We didn’t need lavish floral arrangements or massive centrepieces. Instead, we focused on creating an elegant yet minimalistic atmosphere that felt chic and sophisticated.
A few ideas for making your simple wedding feel luxurious:
- Quality over quantity: Instead of spending money on a large number of guests, invest in high-quality details. Think fine wines, exquisite wedding cakes, and luxurious linens for the tables.
- Elegant design: Simple doesn’t mean plain. You can choose a minimalist design that focuses on quality materials and sophisticated touches. For example, opt for a neutral colour palette with accents of gold or silver, or choose elegant, understated floral arrangements.
- Small luxury touches: Consider adding little luxury elements that elevate the experience for your guests. A personalised wine tasting, high-end catering, or even a post-ceremony cocktail hour can make all the difference.
At the end of the day, luxury is about the experience you create, not the size of the event.
At the end of the day, an intimate wedding is about creating a meaningful celebration that reflects who you are as a couple. It’s not about impressing others or following trends – it’s about crafting an experience that feels true to your relationship and spending time with the people who matter most.
As someone who’s worked in the Melbourne wedding industry for years, and who also had the privilege of experiencing an intimate wedding firsthand, I can confidently say that this style of wedding is a growing trend for all the right reasons. Whether you’re looking for something budget-friendly, more relaxed, or simply more personal, an intimate wedding could be the perfect choice for you.
If you’re considering an intimate wedding in Melbourne, I’d love to hear your thoughts. Let’s chat about what you envision for your big day – and how you can make it as special as possible.
