There's a big list of things you have to do if you're going to be a bridesmaid. A bridesmaid's duties as a member of the Bride Tribe include organising and attending any and all bridal showers, bachelorette parties, and other events leading up to the wedding, as well as being present and available to the bride throughout the wedding weekend. We've broken down the list of bridesmaid responsibilities into those that need to be done before the wedding and those that need to be done during the ceremony itself. If asked to be a bridesmaid, any of your friends, siblings, or relatives should have no problem carrying out their duties in accordance with these instructions.
Looking for the ultimate Wedding Reception Venue in Melbourne? Look no further, Vogue Ballroom is here.
A Bit Of Background
Culturally, religiously, and historically, the role of the bridesmaid has developed in different ways at different times. In ancient Rome, the bride's attendants functioned as a bridal battalion. They formed a procession to follow the bride as she made her way to the groom's hometown. If any disgruntled suitors attempted to steal her dowry, this "protective shield" of similarly attired bridesmaids was meant to step in.
However, the Western custom of the bridesmaid appears to have been inspired by later Roman legislation. To ward off the bad spirits who were thought to attend weddings, this legislation mandated ten witnesses. In order to confuse any evil spirits that might be there, the bridesmaids and ushers would all dress like the bride and husband.
In 19th-century England, it was still widely believed that curses and ill luck might be brought upon a marriage by unfriendly outsiders. It often takes close examination of Victorian wedding images, for instance, to identify the bride and groom.
Congratulations on being asked to be a bridesmaid! To be asked to stand besides a loved one on their wedding day is an incredible honour. And you may be wondering, "What exactly am I supposed to do as a bridesmaid?" What are the duties of a bridesmaid leading up to, during, and following the wedding? You're right about one thing, though: a bridesmaid's duties do not end at the altar. Bridesmaid responsibilities include supporting the bride (reasonably) throughout the wedding preparation process as well as the bachelorette party, bridal shower, and any other pre-wedding events. The list of things you'll have to do as a bridesmaid may seem long, but don't worry; we've got you covered. (And here, exclusively for the maids of honour, is a Maid of Honour Duties Checklist.)
Bridesmaid Responsibilities: Before the Wedding
Be Present For The Bride.
An important part of being a bridesmaid is being there for the bride when she needs you, whether that's with a helping hand or just an ear to listen. She may use some help with planning, or maybe just a good rant.
The Maid Of Honour Deserves Your Presence.
It is possible that some guests will be unaware of the full scope of the duties of the maid of honour in a wedding. It's a lot of work, from organising the bachelorette party to holding the bride's bouquet at the ceremony. Included in the list of bridesmaid responsibilities is the offer to assist the maid of honour in any way she may require it.
Be Upbeat And Offer To Assist With The Planning (Within Reason)
We totally get if you don't want to get too involved in the planning details because it's not your wedding, but that doesn't mean you can't assist the newlyweds in their hunt for wedding suppliers or with any other responsibilities associated with the big day. Please don't let the bride's wedding planning consume your life.
Too busy with life to really plan your wedding in detail? Have someone else do it for you and check out our list of Wedding Planners in Melbourne to help take the stress away.
Find And Reserve Your Travel And Lodging Needs (And Your Plus-One)
It is customary for the couple to reserve a block of hotel rooms for their guests at a destination wedding; nonetheless, it is imperative that you book your travel accommodations as far in advance as you possibly can.
Purchase Your Bridesmaid Attire, Accessories, And Shoes In Advance.
Being on top of things is essential when it comes to the bridesmaid duties, and this includes the outfit. One of the main reasons why you shouldn't put off ordering your bridesmaid dress, shoes, and accessories until the last minute is because you risk them not arriving in time. Not only will this cause you and the other wedding party members worry, but the bride as well. Do yourself a favour and order your bridesmaid dress in advance to avoid any unnecessary stress (and the risk of looking like a clown in the wedding photos).
Take The Bride-To-Be Wedding Gown Shopping.
Shopping for a wedding gown is an individual experience for each bride, as is the composition of her bridal party. If you're invited to a wedding dress shopping party, it's polite to know what to expect and how to act, and it wouldn't hurt to brush up on the most recent bridal fashions in the meanwhile.
Assistance In Organising The Rehearsal Dinner, Bachelorette Party, And Bridal Shower
The maid of honour is responsible for organising most of the activities leading up to the wedding, and since keeping track of all of the little things may be immensely stressful, one of your obligations as a bridesmaid should be to offer assistance with event planning. For a destination bachelorette party, for instance, you could offer to arrange travel and lodging for the other guests.
If You Can, Contribute To The Parties.
Consider asking each member of the bridal party to contribute a certain amount towards the cost of the pre-wedding festivities. After all, you shouldn't have to cover all of the expenses on your own.
Participate In Pre-Wedding Events
Participating in celebrations with the future bride is one of the most enjoyable aspects of one's duty as a bridesmaid. Therefore, make every effort to be present for the wedding festivities, including the bridal shower, bachelorette party, and especially the rehearsal dinner.
Purchase A Wedding Present
Wedding guests are expected to provide the happy couple with a gift as a token of their appreciation for their attendance. Don't forget this in the midst of all the other tasks required of a bridesmaid! Visit their wedding registry and select a present you know they'll enjoy.
Duties Of Bridesmaids On Wedding Day
On the great day of the wedding, the bridesmaids play an important role in ensuring that the bride, her maid of honour, and the majority of the guests have a pleasant experience. How to do it:
Join The Bride In Getting Ready
Timely arrival at the designated getting-ready site with all necessary equipment (bridesmaid dress, shoes, jewellery, cosmetics, undergarments, etc.) in hand is expected of all bridesmaids. The maids of honour should do everything they can to help the bride before the wedding, including getting ready to go down the aisle.
- Maintaining her composure, happiness, and laughter
- Being on the receiving end of her texts, calls, and logistical queries
- Keeping her well-nourished and hydrated is a priority.
- Bringing out the champagne to toast the occasion
- Facilitating the punctual completion of her hair and/or makeup sessions Aiding her with the donning of her garments Helping her with her shoes, jewellery, or veil
To learn more check out our post on What can brides/bridesmaids carry besides flowers?
Assist the MOH
There is a lot of responsibility placed on the maid of honour at the wedding. The bridesmaids' job is to be her right-hand woman, assisting her in any way they can, from running errands (like to the drugstore at the last minute) to coordinating with the wedding planner and photographer to putting together and keeping track of a wedding day emergency kit.
If no other preparations have been made for getting-ready beverages and nibbles, the bridesmaids should take it upon themselves to supply these goodies. Everyone involved in the wedding will be grateful for the thoughtfulness and the refreshments, from the bride and her mother to the photographer and the beauty stylists.
Be The "Bride Tribe"
The bridesmaids' main role on the wedding day is to act as a second pair of hands to the maid of honour. When necessary, they can also act as a liaison between guests and suppliers. In order to be of assistance, the bridesmaids can take care of the following:
Make sure that everyone in the wedding party and any special relatives get their flowers (bouquets, corsages, flower crowns, boutonnieres, or toss petals). Help people pin on boutonnieres and other flower decorations.
Assist visitors in finding their way around the venue; this includes things like parking, restrooms, disabled access, exits, and, if applicable, a bar or refreshment station.
Placing yourself in a prime position to direct and assist guests by standing close to the gift table, guest book, or wedding favours.
Be A Part Of The Ceremony
The bridesmaids should arrive at the ceremony location early, hide out of sight until it's time to go down the aisle, and then be ready to go. Minimise your conversation and show proper deference to the event's organisers or officiant. During the ceremony itself, remember to hit your marks, perform any additional duties you may have been given, and exit the venue in the order in which you entered.
Be Prepared To Take Pictures
The wedding party usually gathers for formal photographs with the newlyweds at the start of the cocktail hour if they did not do so before the ceremony. Bridesmaids should stay together and be ready to follow the photographer's directions for the sake of efficiency and the couple's ability to spend more time enjoying their cocktail hour rather than rounding up random people.
Be The Life Of The Party And Model Guests.
Bridesmaids are expected to socialise with other guests, partake in the reception's offerings (including eating and drinking), sit down at their assigned table when directed to do so, engage in guest-related activities (such as signing the guestbook or using the photo booth), observe any speeches (if any have been arranged in advance), dance (tastefully) during the designated times, and generally have a good time.
Maintain a Stress-Free Departure
Finally, the bridesmaids should assist the maid of honour, the organiser, or the couple's parents in packing up any remaining goods from the reception site. Potential items to pack away:
- Any items of clothes or equipment used in the getting ready process
- Sparklers, favours, and ceremony programmes that were not used.
- Unused booze
- Decorations and signs that were made by hand (not rented)
- Bouquets carried by the bride and/or bridesmaids
- The Exchange of Wedding Vows and Gifts
- This place's official guestbook
- Specialty cake forks, cake plates, and champagne flutes
- A collection of late-night snacks (packaged by the caterer)
- The most important part of the wedding cake
- A late-night wedding cake or two (packaged by the caterer)
- The wedding dress, or the couple's getaway attire if they changed.
The bridesmaids' last logistical tasks include helping to ensure that the things listed above are transported in the appropriate vehicle(s) and assisting with the following.
- Check that everyone has a way to leave the venue safely, whether it's through getting on the correct shuttles or finding a way to their vehicles.
- Distribute the pre-addressed envelopes for tips to the merchants.
- Be responsible for getting the wedding couple's overnight luggage to their room on the night of the wedding.
- Determine how to get people to the after-party if one is being held.
Bridesmaid Responsibilities: Ceremony
Follow The Lead.
The couple should now exchange wedding vows. Make sure there are no hiccups by being aware of when you should walk down the aisle and where you should stand. During the wedding rehearsal, these matters should be covered and practised.
Take Care Of The Children.
You should probably keep an eye on the little ones before you go down the aisle if the happy couple has invited them to the wedding. Since children aren't always good at remaining calm and quiet for extended periods of time, it's okay to resort to bribery.
Get In Line At The Altar With The Bride.
In the end, the real reason you were selected to be a bridesmaid was to be by the bride's side, even if you weren't very active in the pre-wedding events or planning. Keep your head up, your shoulders back, and your grin (but feel free to shed a few tears!)
Reception Duties For Bridesmaids
Engage In Mingling With The Guests
In the event that the newlyweds are delayed in arriving at the reception, the responsibility for keeping the guests entertained will fall on the members of the wedding party. Guests who may not have previously met the bride and groom should be introduced to each other.
Get Your Groove On
Following the first dance, guests are welcome to participate in the celebration. One of the most important things a bridesmaid can do is set a good example. Put together a dancing party with your plus one(s) or a small group of friends. Inviting more people to a wedding is as easy as making the wedding party appear to be having a good time.
Make Sure That The Couple Eats.
Both the preparation and the reception might be a little chaotic. The couple may forget to eat while they are busy greeting and thanking their guests. The bridesmaids should fix the couple a dish or two and have them take a break from the festivities to eat it if they aren't planning on having a formal seated dinner.
Assist The Maid Of Honour In Paying/Tipping Vendors.
Vendors should be tipped and compensated at the close of the night. The maid of honour may be responsible for this if the couple does not hire a wedding planner. A wedding requires a large number of people and services, so if you can, pitch in and help get the ball rolling.
Assist The Newlyweds In Their Exit.
At the end of the night, it is your responsibility as a bridesmaid to see the happy couple off. Send them off with a memorable celebration, whether they're returning home or jetting out on their honeymoon.
Be On Hand At The Wedding
Duh. Confirming flower delivery schedules, greeting and welcoming the ceremony officiant, and obtaining lunch to ensure your bride isn't hungry are all things you might need to do on the day of the wedding. You should also expect to play the role of auxiliary hostess at the reception, when your duties will include making introductions, showing people to the bar, and having them sign the guest book. If you want to dance, you'll have to hold the train and bustle the gown first (and accompany her on visits to the restroom, if asked).
Decide On An Epic Wedding Gift And Go For It
Cooperate with the other attendants to increase your purchasing power. Sometimes all of the bridesmaids will pool their resources to buy the bride a single, truly unforgettable present.
Make Yourself The Life Of The Party.
While it's crucial to get things done, your new wife also wants you to have fun. So, as the music starts playing, dance with the groomsmen in the traditional first dance sequence, and keep an eye out for other guests who may be tapping their feet but lack a dance partner.
The responsibilities of a bridesmaid may change from one ceremony to the next. The scale, theme, and setting all play a role. The bride should think about the financial position of each bridesmaid as well as the overall wedding budget. Since "supporting" may be interpreted differently by different people, I'll put it this way: treat the bride how you would like to be treated if you were the bride.
And nobody likes a downer who finds something wrong with every style of clothing.
What do you think about that? Is the weight of obligation as a bridesmaid getting to you? Discuss your responsibilities and how they could be improved in the space provided below.
A bridesmaid's responsibilities include throwing and attending pre-wedding activities including bridal showers and bachelorette parties. Bridesmaids served as a kind of bridal battalion in ancient Rome. A ten-witness requirement was put in place by law to fend off evil spirits, who were considered to attend marriages. The role of the bridesmaid is to be there for the bride as she plans her wedding. A maid of honor's responsibilities typically include planning the bachelorette party, bridal shower, and other festivities leading up to the wedding.
Help the happy couple find vendors for their wedding and with any other tasks they need help with. All bridesmaids should attend the rehearsal dinner and bachelorette party. In your role as bridesmaid, you must stay on top of things at all times. On the big day, the maid of honour usually needs an extra set of hands, and that's where the bridesmaids come in. Maids of honour are the bride's closest female friends and family members, and it is their responsibility to help the bride in any manner they can on her wedding day.
The maids of honour should get to the church or other ceremony site early and wait inconspicuously until it's time to walk down the aisle. Keep your comments to a minimum and give the event's organisers and/or officiant the respect they deserve. Get ready to pose for some serious wedding photos with the happy couple. Bridesmaid duties include helping the bride and groom down the aisle and watching after the children of the bridal party. One of a bridesmaid's duties is to help out with the wedding's finances, particularly when it comes to tipping and paying the various service providers.
From one wedding to the next, the duties of a bridesmaid could shift slightly. Please provide your thoughts on the following on your duties and how they can be enhanced. Help the newlyweds down the aisle while dancing the night away with the groomsmen and bustling the bride's train.
- Being a bridesmaid comes with a long set of responsibilities.
- As a member of the Bride Tribe, a bridesmaid is expected to be present and available to the bride during the wedding weekend and all events leading up to it, such as the bridal shower, bachelorette party, and the wedding day.
- The duties of the bridesmaids have been divided into two categories: those that occur before the wedding and those that occur during the ceremony.
- Everyone you know, whether they're a friend, sibling, or relative, may easily follow these guidelines if they're asked to be a bridesmaid.
- The Context
- The bridesmaid's customs and duties have changed over time and between cultures, faiths, and eras.
- Bridesmaids served as a kind of bridal battalion in ancient Rome.
- Bridesmaid duties include being by the bride's side (reasonably) before, during, and after the wedding, including during the bachelorette party, bridal shower, and any other pre-wedding activities.
- Some visitors may not be aware of the full breadth of the maid of honor's responsibilities.
- Part of being a bridesmaid is being willing to help out the maid of honour in any way she needs.
- The bride asks that you not let wedding preparations dominate you.
- Get your attendants' dresses, shoes, and accessories early.
- Ordering your bridesmaid dresses, shoes, and accessories early reduces the likelihood that they will not arrive in time for the big day.
- You may save yourself a lot of hassle if you get your bridesmaid dress in advance (and the risk of looking like a clown in the wedding photos).
- Help the bride-to-be find her dream wedding dress.
- You might ask the bridesmaids to chip in a set amount to help pay for the events leading up to the wedding.
- Take Part In Wedding Preparations
- One of the best parts of being a bridesmaid is getting to share in the bride's pleasure at her upcoming nuptials.
- Attend the wedding's events as much as possible, especially the rehearsal dinner, bridal shower, and bachelor/bachelorette parties.
- The bridesmaids are responsible for making sure the bride, her maid of honour, and the majority of guests have a good time on the wedding day.
- The maids of honour have the responsibility of assisting the bride in any way possible in the lead up to the wedding, including helping her prepare to go down the aisle.
- Participate in the "Bride Tribe"
- On the big day, the maid of honour usually needs an extra set of hands, and that's where the bridesmaids come in.
- The bride, groom, and any particularly important relatives should all get a bouquet (bouquets, corsages, flower crowns, boutonnieres, or toss petals).
- Standing close to the gift table, guest book, or wedding favours will put you in a great position to direct and help guests.
- Participate in the Ritual
- The maids of honour need to get to the church or other ceremony site far ahead of time, find a place to conceal, and wait until it's their turn to walk down the aisle before they start getting ready.
- Take Pictures, But Be Ready To Do So
- If the wedding party didn't take photos with the newlyweds before the ceremony, they normally do so before the beginning of the cocktail hour.
- Make a good impression and be the life of the party.
- Ensure a Hassle-Free Departure
- The bridesmaids' final task is to help the maid of honour, the event planner, or the bride and groom's parents clean up the reception location.
- Help the newlyweds with their overnight bags by delivering them to their hotel room on the night of the wedding.
- If there is an after-party, figure out how to get everyone there.
- Make sure the kids are okay.
- Even if you weren't involved in a lot of the pre-wedding activities or planning, the main reason you were asked to be a bridesmaid was so that you could be by the bride's side on her special day.
- Gather a few close friends or a date and throw a dance party.
- It's possible that both the setup and the actual event will be a bit chaotic.
- At the conclusion of the night, it is customary to tip and pay vendors.
- If the bride and groom do not hire a wedding planner, the maid of honour may be in charge of this.
- As a bridesmaid, it is your duty to see the newlyweds off into the night.
- Obviously, you should show up to the wedding.
- On the wedding day, you might need to do things like confirm the time of flower deliveries, welcome the officiant, and feed the bride lunch.
- Become the centre of attention at any gathering.
- Dimensions, subject matter, and context all make an impact.
FAQs About Bridesmaid
She may be asked to help the bride dress, hold her flowers during the ceremony, assist her with her veil during the ceremony, or arrange her train once she is at the altar. Most maids or matrons-of-honor are also asked to serve as a witness by signing the marriage license and holding the groom's wedding band.
There's no reason you can't ask a married friend to be a maid. You can refer to her as a bridesmaid in your programs, and everywhere else too no need for a bridesmatron title. Think of it this way: Being a bridesmaid is more like being a "Ms." than a "Miss."
The tradition is based on an Old English rhyme that dates back to 19th-century Lancashire. It describes the items a bride should have on her wedding day: "something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue, a sixpence in your shoe."
Never in a million years! We think it looks great when there is a mix of even and odd numbers in the bridal party. There is always the option of having one of the groomsmen walk two bridesmaids or vice versa.
The gentlemen do not necessarily need to be the ones to lead the bride and attendants down the aisle. They can leave in a row from the side entrance, giving the ladies more room to strut their stuff on their own.